An Informed Conscience:
Walking with God
By Rev. Joseph Hattie, OMI
Published by
Priests for Life Canada
www.priestsforlifecanada.com
Revised 2001
First Printed in 1991
By the Office of Marriage and Family Formation Archdiocese of Vancouver
ISBN 0-9683191-0-6
Available in booklet format (40 pages, 5.5" x 8.5") for $3.00 per copy, plus $1.25 shipping, from:
Priests for Life Canada
P.O. Box 43
Cumberland, Ontario, Canada K4C 1E5
Toll free: 1-888-300-2007 Tel/Fax (613) 834-2226
Email: priests@priestsforlifecanada.com
www.priestsforlifecanada.com
III THE SEARCH FOR WHAT IS TRUE
B. Assistance in the Search (1)
Our Holy Father, Pope John Paul II tells us in Familiaris Consortio, that parents are the primary, though not the only, educators of their children. They are especially responsible for the formation of their children’s consciences. This book has been written to help prepare you for your future role as parents.
The objectives of the book are:
· To help engaged/married couples appreciate how much they can help each other, both in the formation of their individual consciences and those of their children. This is truly a work of love.
· To help parents realize that since they are the primary teachers of their children, and thus the first to assist in the formation of their children’s conscience, it is important that they understand what these responsibilities entail.
· To examine explicitly what it means to inform one’s conscience.
· To give guidelines for informing one’s conscience in a responsible way.
· To help develop an attitude of humility toward the truth, so that one will seek to discover it rather than create it.
· To introduce the concept of objective reality.
· To make manifest the importance of one’s decisions and how to make decisions in harmony with God.
· To explain why the Church teaches us to follow an informed conscience.
Have you ever considered what you might have done if it had been you in the Garden of Eden rather than Adam and Eve? Do you think you might have done better? Do you think you might have been wiser, especially when conversing with Satan?
Most likely, we like to think we would have done better or have been wiser than Adam and Eve. Such thoughts, however, should lead us to ask the obvious question: How could we have done better? The answer of course is: by doing what Adam and Eve failed to do. They should have taken the time to discover whether the stranger in the garden had actually told them the truth, before they acted on what he told them. This effort is called informing one’s conscience.
It is important always to inform your conscience before you act so that you chose the good and avoid the evil. To appreciate this, reflect on the fact that there were drastic consequences when Adam and Eve acted without informing their consciences. Throughout the rest of your life, you will have many opportunities to do better than Adam and Eve. Pray daily for the grace to do so.
II INFORMING ONE’S CONSCIENCE:
SOME FACTS
In the first three chapters of Genesis, God gave us many points to reflect upon when considering the importance of our decisions. I would like to expand briefly upon a few of them here.
A. You are a gift: Man is the only creature on this earth that God has created for itself.1 Therefore each human being is firstly a gift to one’s self. Thus each human being is called to become a total gift, by giving himself freely, as a gift. At the base of each of our free decisions, we give ourselves to someone. Ultimately we give ourselves either to God or to Satan through each decision we make. The life of Adam and Eve teaches us this most important lesson.
B. You are of great value: Our decisions are important for another reason. As God’s special creations, we have a very great value. When we give ourselves as a gift to another, we are not giving away a few dollars’ worth of chemicals, but rather the most precious of God’s creatures in this world. We know that if we give something good to God, then He will do many more good things with it. It is part of the mystery of His love that He wants us to cooperate with Him in doing good for others. For example, when Christ fed the five thousand people in the wilderness, He used the five loaves and two fish given to him by the young boy (cf. Mt. 14:17-21). In our time, Christ has physically and spiritually fed millions through His Church and individuals like Mother Teresa, who gave the gift of herself to him.
On the other hand, since Satan’s intentions are to bring about the absence of the good that should be (evil), he needs good gifts to do so. And the better the gifts which are given to him, the more evil he can do. Certainly the very best gift one can give to him is one’s self; with a person he can do much evil. History is replete with outstanding examples of Satan’s power to being about the absence of the good that should be in a person’s life. Two better know examples are the horrendous evil deeds of Hitler and Stalin.
C. Satan makes great efforts to persuade us to give ourselves to him: The advertising industry, a product of our modem society, is an excellent manifestation of the importance of our free decisions. The industry often works from the principle that the easiest way to get something you want from another human being is simply by encouraging him to give it to you. Billions of dollars are spent each year in an effort to convince people to make various kinds of decisions, each of which involves giving something of theirs, either money, or votes. This approach works because there is always implied the promise of something more in return.2
With so much money at stake it is not surprising that the advertising industry has made great efforts to discover ways of influencing people’s decisions. In particular, they seek ways to give people the impression that they are actually deciding freely, or ‘on their own’.
Now, consider that, if the advertising industry puts so much effort into convincing people to give their money to product sponsors, how much more effort is Satan likely to expend in trying to convince us to give him, for his own selfish and destructive purposes, that which is the most precious of God’s creations in this world — ourselves. Our decisions truly are important.
D. Decisions are two-edged swords: Christ has taught us to love our neighbour as ourselves. We must never ignore the fact that our decisions affect not only others, but also ourselves. Each decision we make is like a two-edged sword: it does something for, or to others and at the same time it does something for or to ourselves.
This principle is part of the mystery of being a human being, for what we do, contributes to what we become. God taught this to Adam and Eve ‘in the beginning’. Their original sin illustrated the principle from the negative perspective: Their sinful action made them sinners — blocking their path to fulfillment (cf. GS#1 3). The fact is that God has created each of us as a gift to our self and He gave us the ability to be a gift to others. Thus, the more we give of ourselves in ways that are in harmony with God’s will, the more we will be in harmony with all that is good and the greater a gift we will become. Ordinarily we do not see this process happening in ourselves, because it is a part of the mystery of God’s love. We see the fruits later. But we can see it happening in others, especially in the lives of saints. We also know that when we refuse to be a gift for others (and thus give ourselves to Satan through sin), then we become less than the gift we are and, as we become less, we have less to give to others.
These observations may be expressed, as a general principle, in terms of privilege and responsibility. It is our great privilege to have been given the gift of human life by God. As with every privilege, this gift of life comes with corresponding and balancing responsibilities. In particular, we are as human beings responsible not only for what we do, but also for what we become as a result of what we do.
For example, if, as I am walking home from work, I notice an elderly lady struggling to carry her groceries, I can decide to help her, that is, to give her the gift of myself through the gift of my time and energy. If I do so, then I am not only responsible for what I have done, but also for what I become as a result of my action. I have somehow become more of a gift as a result of that mysterious interaction between my actions and God’s grace. Furthermore, one might say that by helping her I have become more of a loving, creative person, and so have become more of an image and likeness of God. As such I will, in turn, benefit others.
However, if I notice that the elderly lady has a hundred dollars in her purse, I can decide to steal it. If I do so, I am responsible not only for that action, but also for what I become as a result of doing it. In acting this way, I have not given myself as a gift. Instead, I have taken that which is not mine, have acted selfishly, and destroyed a good which already existed. Thus, I have done something evil. As a result, I have impoverished myself as a gift, and become less generous and less able to love and be creative (cf. ibid.). In other words, I am not being faithful to myself as a person made in the image and likeness of God. As with the first example, other people will be affected by this decision of mine; for, as a result of what I have become, I am less able to love them and creatively do the good which needs to be done.
This example may also help us to understand why we should never try to justify doing something we know is wrong by saying, “It doesn’t affect anyone else.” The reality is that everything we do, no matter how private, does affect others either directly or indirectly, because of what it does to us as gifts.
E. Privileges are balanced by corresponding responsibilities: As human beings it is our great privilege to be able to make decisions. Each decision we make can be either to do good or to do evil; to be creative and loving, or selfish and destructive; to be faithful to the fact that we are made in the image and likeness of God, or to reject his call. But in accepting this great privilege of using our free will, we must be willing to assume the corresponding and balancing responsibilities.
Simply stated, these responsibilities are: to discover the truth, which God has given to us and to choose to do the good which needs to be done in the light of that truth. Thus, for us to assume our true responsibilities as human beings, it is required that we use our intellect and free will as they were intended to be used.
Let us begin with some points that will guide us in making sound decisions. We must begin by searching for the truth, so that our decisions will be in harmony with the good which needs to be done.
We know from the first two chapters of Genesis that God took great care to teach us the important truths of life. He knew that without this knowledge, we would be unable to make free and sound decisions. He also knew that it was only with this knowledge that our decisions would be healthy ones: contributing in a positive way to all the relationships in which we have the privilege to be involved. The truths God gave to Adam and Eve, are, and more because of the Incarnation, still available to us today. But as a result of original sin we have to exert much more effort to make these truths our own. However, do not be put off by the need for effort — the results are well worth the struggle. Let us now consider the following points, to assist us in our efforts to discover truth.
1. Objective Reality: In the search for what is true, it is a great asset to be aware that you are searching for what is called objective reality. What do these two words mean?
They refer to that which exists, independently of what I think or desire. It is most important to grasp this point, because it helps you to realize that your goal is to discover what is, not to create it (God has already created what is true and good). To attain this goal you must have an attitude of openness and of humility toward what exists, that is, toward the truth. Thus you must also be willing to call what is true, true, and what is not true, not true.3
The table on which my typewriter is resting is an example of an objective reality. It has an existence which does not depend upon my knowing or recognizing it. Whether I am in the room or not, and whether I admit its existence or not, the table still exists. Now, since both the table and I exist, I find myself in a real (not subjective) relationship with it. If this relationship is to be a healthy one, then I must make the effort to discover certain truths about this desk. I use my intelligence to acquire knowledge of the truth; that is, I must try to have what is in my mind conform to what is in reality. Once there is sufficient harmony between what is in my mind and the objective reality of the desk, a basis exists for a healthy relationship with it. This in turn enables good to be done. For example, I know that it can be used not only to hold my typewriter but also to serve a meal to others; or that it is strong enough to bear my weight as I stand on it to change the bulb in the ceiling light.
2. Subjective Reality: It will help our understanding if we contrast objective reality with subjective reality. Subjective reality is that which exists only within my mind, that is, it has no existence outside of my mind. We are all familiar with subjective reality. One common example, is the young child who is afraid to put out his bedroom light because he thinks a monster will then immediately appear; another is the child who thinks that there is a real Santa Claus who slides down the chimney with a sack of gifts at Christmas. We all have this ability to generate images in our imaginations, and it can have some benefits. But we also must acquire the humility which helps us to realize that our thinking and willing something, does not cause it to be.
This fact must be emphasized. We have all been taught it and certainly apply it in our daily life, especially with regard to the material world. However, we tend to resist applying it to non-material areas, such as morality: what is right and wrong.
Let us look at some examples. We all know that in order to drive a car there must be gas in the tank. Simply thinking that the tank is full, or willing it to be, does not make it so. Some learn this lesson the hard way when they run out of gas and must walk several miles to a gas station before they can continue their journey.
This example illustrates the principle that there is a price to pay for acting only on the basis of what we call subjective reality. The principle applies to moral reality as well as to material reality. If a young woman thinks her fiancé is a single man, when in fact he is already married, that will not make him single. If she were to go through a marriage ceremony with him on the assumption that he is truly single, objectively she would not be married. The fact that she is not married is true even though she sincerely thinks she is.
Sincerity, by itself, is never enough: simply being sincere does not protect you from harm, nor does it protect you from harming yourself or others. Adam and Eve told themselves that eating of the forbidden fruit was good, but we know that the results of their acting without the truth, even if sincerely, was disastrous. A young child is sincere in wanting to learn about the bright red object on the kitchen stove — the electric element. But if the child tries to learn by touching the element, her sincerity will not protect her from burning her hand. Each of these examples manifests the principle that sincerity without the truth can be very dangerous.
3. Teaching Children the Difference: Parents must be aware of the need to teach their children the difference between objective and subjective reality. This distinction is one of the great gifts parents can give their children. In so doing, they will be giving them an edge on true freedom because as Christ teaches: “You shall know the truth and the truth will make you free.” (Jn. 8:32) As parents, you will be teaching your child this distinction when you teach her that the hot electric element is not just a pretty thing to grasp, and that to do so will burn her hand and thereby limit her freedom in using it. In this way, you teach your child not to enter into a touching relationship with the hot element, because it will not be a healthy and beneficial relationship for her.
Or consider the situation of a child who sees some colored pills and thinking they are candy, wants to eat them. As a parent, observing your child, you will know that the child’s thoughts are not in harmony with the reality of the pills. Consequently, you know that if he enters into an eating relationship with the pills, it will not be a healthy relationship for him. As a result, you say, “No, you cannot eat those; they are not what you think they are, and they will harm you if you eat them.” You will then try to explain as much of the objective reality as he can understand at that age.
In his early years, a child’s knowledge of objective reality on various levels comes particularly through the faith and trust he has in his parents. Later, however, he will be able to verify the truth of what he has learned for himself.
Parents, you truly do give your children a great gift by teaching them the difference between subjective and objective reality. The value of this gift is more immediately apparent on the material plane, but if you strive to teach your children that similar differences exist on the moral, spiritual and religious planes, you will have given them an even greater gift. Also, always remember that in teaching your children these truths you are working in harmony with God, doing for your children what He did for Adam and Eve in the garden. You are teaching them the important truths in life — those truths which will give them freedom and provide them with the basis for healthy life-giving relationships.
Teaching your children these truths is one of your greatest privileges, and the years you have to teach each child are relatively short. Do not waste those years, and do not give them to someone else.
4. The Teenage Years: You will observe that most parents teach these realities to their young children with a great deal of energy and confidence. But as the children become older, and especially when they reach their teens, many parents begin to lose their confidence and courage. They back off from teaching about objective reality, especially when they encounter strong emotional reactions to it in their children. At times like these, they may have to pay a high price for teaching the truth; when a child is young, it is relatively easy to teach him about his limits, or that a lie is not in harmony with objective reality. But a teenage person often feels he has no limits or believes that everything he thinks or wills is true, thus making the situation much more difficult. At these times it is important not to back away from the truth of objective reality. When it is necessary to teach him a new truth, or re-teach it, parents must find new ways to do so. It may even mean asking someone outside the family to help — perhaps a priest, a teacher, or a family friend. Often teenagers do need to hear what you know must be heard, but they need to hear it from someone who does not have the same emotional involvement with them as you have.
Parents in this situation are often amazed to find that someone outside the family can say once what they have said many times before, and their child will act as if he had just heard it for the first time. Often the child responds by saying, “Hey, this makes sense.” At such times parents are wise to be quiet and, in humility, say a prayer of thanks. Your silence at this time will be the good which needs to be done to help your child inform his conscience on the matter at hand.
B. Assistance in the Search (1)
1. Who to ask: Experience with life teaches us that even as adults we often need to ask the help of others in our search for objective reality. For example, it is common to seek advice in the areas of car repairs and bodily health. As a result, we quite readily turn to mechanics and doctors for assistance in determining objective reality, so that we can make good decisions in these matters.
Let us consider first the case of the mechanic. There are good mechanics and bad ones. The difference lies in the ability of the good mechanic to discover the objective reality of a malfunctioning car, that is, what is really wrong with it. With this information, he can make a sound judgment about what to do next. His ability allows him to provide us with a valuable service: one for which we are willing to pay. Experience shows that by taking the trouble to ascertain the objective reality about one’s car, one can avoid many future problems, save a great deal of money, and often save lives.
The poor mechanic, for whatever reason, does not have the ability to discover what is really wrong with a car: the objective reality. As a result he must guess at the cause of the problem. Such a mechanic operates on the basis of his subjective reality. Because there is a lack of harmony between what is in his mind and the objective problem with the car, decisions made on the basis of his advice cannot be sound. They will not be good for the car, nor for the client’s pocket book. If the client continues to return to the poor mechanic, more money, and perhaps even lives, will be lost.
What we have said about mechanics is also true of medical doctors. When a patient in pain comes to a good doctor, the doctor uses his skills to discover the real cause of the problem, that is, what the objective reality is. Having discovered this, he can suggest what needs to be done to correct the problem. Then the patient knows what is truly wrong, he can also make sound decisions, have a good relationship with the doctor, and receive treatment which restores health. On the other hand, we know what happens when a patient is treated by a doctor who only guesses at what is wrong, but is convinced that his guess is reality, and bases his decisions on it
Both the medical profession and the state are acutely aware of how important it is that those involved in treating patients be able to ascertain objective medical reality. We, too, need to be aware of its importance on the moral level and obtain sufficient training to be able to recognize it.
2. The Need for Trust: We know from experience that a certain degree of trust is required as part of the relationship with the mechanic or the doctor. This trust is especially necessary if the client has not been trained in the relevant field, and so may not fully understand the explanation he is given. A good doctor or mechanic confirms this trust and builds it for the future by giving good results. This process of evaluation is part of what Christ is teaching when he says: “By their fruits you will know them.” (Mt. 7:16)
C. Assistance in the Search (2)
1. Moral, Spiritual, and Religious Realities: There is an objective reality in the moral, spiritual and religious realms of life. In these realms as in the others, sound decisions are required if we are to form healthy relationships with God and our neighbour. You can appreciate that it is more difficult to discover objective reality in these areas than it is in the areas of mechanics or medicine. We must also be aware that in these realms we are more likely to equate our subjective reality with objective reality. Being difficult to find, however, does not make objective reality any less real. This simply means that we will need to seek help more often, and from those who are trained in discovering objective reality in these areas. Once found, it will set us free.
We saw how, in the beginning, God helped Adam and Eve to know objective truth. And now, since the disaster of original sin, the need for this knowledge is even greater. For one of the effects of original sin was to dim our ability to see objective truth in these less visual areas of reality.
2. Who to Ask: When seeking moral and religious advice in these areas, you should apply the same principles which you apply in searching for a good mechanic or doctor. A good spiritual director or pastor, for example, is able to show you objective reality (spiritual, moral, and intellectual), because he knows how to discover it (just as does the good doctor in his field). In contrast, a poor spiritual director relies on, for example, guesses and current opinions. Consequently his advice is based mainly on subjective reality. As in medicine, subjective reality does not provide a secure basis for decisions which are meant to contribute to sound, strong, spiritual and moral health. Such direction usually results in your being subjected to various kinds of techniques, depending on what is popular at the time.
As your life continues, you will have occasion to seek help in discovering the objective reality concerning various questions in these areas of life. Choose a good spiritual director to help you. You have a responsibility to search for and consult with those who work on the basis of objective reality. The truth they show you, you can trust.
3. Comparing his Advice to God’s: One method that helps in assessing whether or not a director is advising you on the basis of objective reality, is to compare what he says with what God has already taught us, for example, in the Ten Commandments. If the advice would mean breaking one of the Commandments then you can be certain that the person is working on the level of subjective reality, and will not be able to provide good help.
It is helpful to remember always that sincerity, by itself, whether in you or in the one you ask for help, is not sufficient. By itself, it cannot provide the basis for decisions which produce creative, loving actions in harmony with God’s creative, loving actions.
So far we have concentrated on deepening your appreciation of objective reality by saying what it is, why it is important, and why you should make an effort to discover it before making decisions. We have mentioned factors which can help you in your search and others which you would do well to avoid, since they can only hinder you. However, one important lesson we need to learn in this life is that the truth must be approached with an attitude of humility, for we are called to discover it — not to invent or create it.
We naturally lean towards the good, and our will encourages our intellect to seek what is good. Thus the good can, in a sense, be chosen and possessed. In doing this we remain faithful to ourselves as made in the image and likeness of God.
I emphasize these points because I wish to encourage you strongly: always use this great gift of freedom to choose the good that needs to be done. Do not allow your feelings to rule your intellect, or else they will become the directing force of your free will.
I would like to begin this section with some reflections on the significance of the human person, since it is the human person who informs his conscience. I will offer these reflections with the help of a diagram, and hopefully a little humour.
When a young lady, Jill, first sees an attractive young man, Tim, could one say that she sees what is in the diagram below?
1. Externals: Let us begin with the outer circle, which represents a certain level of knowledge about Tim. We will then gradually move inwards, as indicated by the increasingly smaller circles which represent other levels of knowledge of the person.
This first circle represents what Jill sees when she first becomes aware of Tim, that is, his external or physical appearance. This dimension includes, for example, how tall he is, the color of his eyes and hair, and what he is wearing. It is normal to be aware of this physical dimension, because the first information we observe and record whenever we meet another human being, is his visible appearance and other external facts. This has certainly been the pattern since Adam first saw Eve. We are created as body-persons, and so first the external dimensions of the body present themselves to the senses, especially vision and hearing.
We tend to automatically collect this information, even though we are always aware that there is more to a person than meets the eye. With an attitude of openness, we will be able to learn some of that ‘more’. If Jill has this attitude when she first meets Tim, good things can be built on the natural attractions of external appearances.
2. Lust: Of course, if we do not have a positive attitude of openness to the ‘more’ in another, and a willingness to discover it, we tend (at least mentally) to reduce the other to his external factors and attractions. We thus essentially reduce the other person to an object. Since objects are things to use, it is then tempting to think of ways we might use the person. Once this thought arises, the foundation is laid for lust. Lust is a vice (cf. CCC #2351)~. In its simplest form it is an act of devouring another as an object — either mentally or sensually. Obviously, this attitude is to be avoided in human relationships and especially in a marriage and a family.
The excitement a newly engaged couple feels comes from their knowing that each has been chosen by the other, not as an object, but for the total person that he or she is. This realization should strengthen both of you in your love and your intentions to never treat each other as objects. It will also help you to give your future children a better remote preparation for marriage and family.
3. Natural Attraction to the Good: Remember, too, that when God created us, he created us very good. As a result, we have what might be called a natural attraction to the good. When we meet another human being, we experience him at the level of outward appearances, and so it is at this level that the attraction to the good begins. We saw that before original sin, Adam, because of grace had the ability to see not only the external good of the other, but also her total good — all in the first glance (cf. Gen. 2:23). Since original sjn, however, we must constantly strive, one step at a time, to reach this same point. So when we find ourselves attracted to the external good in another person, we should be encouraged to discover more of the good that is iii the person. This is of course a great compliment to the other.
In contrast, the person who reduces the other to a mere object is saying, in effect, “The only good here is what meets my eye.” Obviously, this belief is grossly untrue and a great insult to both the other person and to God, who created and redeemed Rim.
In our example, Jill has this positive attitude of openness toward Tim: she is open to discovering more of the good in him, which means that she is open to learning more about who he really is. Therefore, she decides to stay around and come to know him better.
As Jill gets to know Tim, she soon discovers some of the goodness expressed in qualities he has developed, for example, his ability to sing, to cook, to organize, to make people laugh, to play tennis, to skate and to teach Scripture. The time of discovery can be rather fascinating and exciting; a special excitement is always added to human relationships when good things are discovered about the other. Adam too felt this excitement when he first saw Eve and discovered her truth and goodness (cf Ibid.).
1. Infatuation: While this excitement remains good in this context, it is important that we understand it properly: it is usually what we call infatuation, and should not be mistaken for authentic love. Infatuation does assist in the discovery of the good of the other person, but it lacks that enduring quality essential to authentic love. Consequently, no lasting relationship, such as marriage, should ever be based on infatuation; it has to develop into true love.
2. Qualities are not the Person: Unfortunately, some couples try to build a marriage on this foundation, thinking it is real love. A few years later, many find themselves asking, “Is this the person I married?” The reason is that the qualities an individual has are not the person; they are simply ways in which the person expresses himself. Consequently, they can change with circumstances, even though the person himself remains the same.
Qualities are also means by which a person tries to be creative and do good in the various situations in which he finds himself. We are emphasizing good qualities. A person can also develop negative qualities such as selfishness. Discovering such qualities in a person would indicate that he or she is not ready for marriage.
Experience teaches that life often presents us with new situations: they require a creative response, if we are to do the good which needs to be done. By learning to respond thus, we often develop new qualities. This is very evident to parents as they respond to the needs (the good which needs to be done) of their growing children. Later they discover they have become more patient and generous, have learned to drive, to teach catechism, etc.
Enjoy the excitement of the process of discovering the good in other persons, and encourage its development. But do not make the mistake of thinking that the qualities of a person are the person himself. Parents, must have the same attitude towards their children, for there will be much good to discover in them. Rejoice and be excited by the good qualities you find, but do not mistake a child’s qualities for the person the child is.
The fact that a person is not his qualities is dramatically brought home to us when a debilitating illness strikes and drastically alters a person’s means of self-expression. At such a time, we either penetrate to the core of the person’s goodness, and respond to that in love, or we move away from him.
Parents, teach these basic truths to your children. Let them learn in their own home how to make the basic distinctions between a person’s qualities and the person himself. By understanding this distinction they will wisely choose their future spouse and will thank you for this gift later in life.
In order to move from this second circle, which represents a person’s qualities, to the third circle, you need respect, humility and patience. This third circle represents the inner or true self. When you know it, you know the person. The inner self of another is not something you can take; rather, it is a kind of hidden and precious gift which must be freely given by the person to whom it belongs. (This attitude is most important in marriage.) You must learn to wait with respect and humble patience before this mystery is revealed.
It is when this gift is given that one begins to touch the core (or foundation) of the human being. When you see it, you are privileged to see and experience more clearly the truth, goodness and beauty of that person, and begin to glimpse the gift of God which he or she is.
I use the terms truth, goodness, and beauty because, as we know, each person is a special creation of God, and whatever God creates has truth, goodness and beauty. This means that each person is a unique creative ‘word’ spoken by God, a word which in fact he will never speak again. That is how special each person is. In this sense there can never be a substitute for any person. The gift of each person does not allow for comparison. Therefore it is a waste of time to compare yourself to others on this level of gift.
1. Truth, Goodness and Beauty: Let us return to these three terms and develop their meaning as they apply to the self. Returning to our example, Tim is God’s spoken creative word. Since God’s word is always true, there is in Tim’s very being, the special truth of who and what he is. God’s word is always good, so there is also a special and basic goodness of who and what Tim is. This special goodness is his from the very beginning of his existence. We also know that God’s creative word radiates beauty, because it is from the union of truth and goodness that real beauty is born. Thus Tim has his own inner beauty as a unique creative spoken word of God; it is his own unique beauty born from the union of his own unique truth and goodness. The same is true of each one of us. It is true of every child God gives to a family, and it is very important to teach these truths to children.
We must remember that original sin affects each of us from the time of conception; this tendency to evil obscures our ability to see another person clearly. The fact that the gift of another person is not immediately apparent, however, does not mean that it does not exist.
We also know that we have been given the gifts of intelligence and free will. We can either use these gifts to build on the truth, goodness and beauty which have been given to us, especially in our creation and redemption, or we can use them in a way which takes away from it. This choice reflects a deeper dimension of what was explained above, that is, that we are responsible not only for what we do, but also for what we become as a result of what we do.
We also face this choice with respect to one another. We can help each other to be faithful to the truth, goodness and beauty that is ours, and thus help each other to grow in the image and likeness of God. Or we can lead others to be unfaithful, and thus be destructive of themselves as God’s image and likeness. Marriage and family certainly require a commitment on the part of husband and wife to do the former, both for each other, and for the children. Children must also be taught how to help each other in this same way.
The words of Isaiah, the prophet, may help you in your reflections on this point. As he relates God’s prophetic word to us, Isaiah says: “For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return without watering the earth, making it yield and giving growth to provide seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be, that goes forth from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I propose, and prosper in the things for which I sent it.” (Is. 55:10-11)
For example, we discover part of the truth of who a person is when we discover what God has called him to do. At present, he may be calling Tim and Jill into the rich harvest of marriage, to do a great deal of good within their own marriage and family for the Church and the world. Like the gentle rain that comes down from heaven and does good for the soil, the plants and thus for mankind, so Tim and Jill can do a great deal of good before they return to him from whom they first came.
D. Love’s Foundation: The Person
Love finds its foundation in this permanent core of the person. You can verify this dimension of permanency for yourself. Simply mediate on your own past reflections on yourself. Think back to when you were three and reflected on yourself, when you were six, twelve and eighteen. At each moment in the past it was always the same you who was doing the reflecting. As the years have passed, you have grown physically, intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually, but the person reflecting is still the same you. It is this person, the rock of stability, which is your true core. In our relationships with others, as with ourselves, we must always be faithful to this truth.
In particular, the relationship of marriage must build lasting love on this basis. Spouses, your love must be for the person himself; you must love the person’s own special truth, goodness and beauty. When you love in this way it gives a proper perspective for understanding and adjusting to any outward changes which may take place over the years, especially those which come with advancing age or illness. It is a form of ongoing conversion.
When you love in this way it also gives you more confidence in facing the future together. This is because the inner beauty of a person is meant to increase with advancing years even though the exterior beauty may fade. Consequently, when a person is loved in this way there is no need to fear competition from the external beauty of youth. Help each other to develop this inner beauty, and grow in your ability to recognize it in each other. In other words, strive to see each other through God’s eyes.
Parents, as you help your children to inform their consciences, be certain to teach them of their unconditional worth. This resides in their own unique truth, goodness and beauty, which has been created by the Father and redeemed by the Son. Teach them also the source of their own beauty: God and his grace. Teach them how to accept themselves and to let the inner beauty which is theirs radiate. They will find that not only does it transform the outer levels, but it also nourishes the inner ones.
The late Mother Teresa exemplifies this truth. From the time God put her on the world stage, as a model of charity, until her death, her physical appearance would never have won her a Miss Universe beauty title. But she was considered by most people who met her, (including Princess Diana) to be the most beautiful person they have ever met. Why? Because over the years she co-operated with God and his grace in developing the inner beauty which was hers, and which shone outward in a way that all can see. What a marvelous freedom this gave her! She was not concerned that others approve of her physical appearance or her ability to entertain or sing, or pass exams. She was free from the control the world often exercises on people who depend on others approval of their beauty and skills. Her freedom allowed her true self to blossom in the love of God and Neighbor.
Give your children this same gift of freedom and they too will become someone beautiful for God and for others.
1. Our Helper: Let us now put God explicitly into our diagram. We will put Him in two places: first outside the circles and then at the heart of the inner circle. We do this to show first, that in His relationship with us He is both separate from us and very close to us. Second that, because He is Truth, Goodness and Beauty. He wants to relate to us in our truth, goodness and beauty, which He has given to us via creator and redemption.
a) Within the person: We may be tempted to keep God at a distance, offering him only the other two levels of ourselves. For example, we might say, “I will go to Church on Sunday, Lord, and put on a new suit just for you to look at, but please don’t look at what is deep within my heart.” Or, “I will go and sing in the choir and give you one of my qualities each Sunday, but please don’t ask me to give you my heart.” But true love is never satisfied with externals, and so God, our Redeemer wants to be invited into our inner sanctuary and there to relate to the total person we each are.
It is here, in this inner sanctuary, that we make our personal decisions. In this inner sanctuary we can make our moral decisions with him and, in a sense, in front of him. To do so gives us a great advantage to this arrangement, it makes available to us the best possible Counselor to assist us in making sound decisions, for example about what is right and wrong, or what the good is which needs to be done in order to grow in love.
The Second Vatican Council expressed this well in its teaching on conscience. It says: “Conscience is the most secret, core of a man. There he is alone with God whose voice echoes in his depths.” ~
b) Outside the person: In our diagram God is also placed outside of the three circles to emphasize the fact that He speaks and helps us from without as well as from within. This is especially important since original sin, because there is another who also tries to speak to us as from within. He especially speaks to our intellect, in his attempts to deceive us as to what is true and what is not. And so God has given us a means of checking the truth of what we hear within: by comparing it with what He has said externally, for example, in the Ten Commandments. We know that if what we hear from within is not in harmony with what God has said outside, then we should disregard what we bear inside because it is not from Him. We need to do this for the good of our moral health, both temporal and eternal. There is a fundamental principle at work here, of which we can be absolutely certain: God does not contradict Himself.
2. God does not contradict himself: We see an excellent application of this principle made by Mary herself in St. Luke’s Gospel (1:26-38). The angel Gabriel appeared to her in her frame of reference, that is, in the form of a man. He claimed to offer her the opportunity to do a great deal of good for God and for the whole world. As she listened to what he said, she was disturbed; He was speaking of becoming a mother ~ Mary certainly knew enough reproductive biology to know that this could not be done in her present state without violating God’s commandmeflt5. And so she asked that very wise and penetrating question: “How can this be since I have no husband?” (v.34). Then the angel Gabriel explained that it would be done by means of God’s own creative power - the same power by which He created the world. Having informed her conscience in this way, she knew it was not Satan but God who was asking this of her, and so she freely chose to say ‘yes’ to Him. She freely chose to give Him the gift of herself so that He could do more good; that of giving her and us the incredible gift of Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour.
Eve and Adam could have saved themselves and all of us a lot of heartache, had they applied this same principle in the Garden of Eden when Satan offered them what appeared to be an opportunity to do good things. For in this case it was quite apparent that in order to accomplish the ‘good’ suggested by Satan they would have to disobey God.
1. The Total Vision of Man
a) External Sources: Our diagram helps us to see that God, in his mercy, is doing a great deal to help us to inform our conscience. He has made known to us, all we need to know to be true to ourselves and to him, in all of our decisions and actions. He is constantly encouraging us to make those decisions which are in harmony with him. God is not indifferent to us. However, He does not take the responsibilities which are ours. Since we have the privilege of making decisions, we must also assume the corresponding and balancing responsibilities. These include gathering the necessary information (from that which God has made available), so that we can discover the objective reality and thus make healthy, life-giving decisions. Were God to assume this responsibility for us, we would be put out of balance because we would then be exercising a privilege without accepting the corresponding and balancing responsibilities. And God certainly would not do this to us.
Thus, in assuming our responsibility in this area we should be prepared to do our homework. This means seeking information from five basic sources: (i) human nature; (ii) the wisdom of the ages; (iii) our reason; (iv) Scripture; and (v) the teaching and wisdom of the Church. These efforts are be accompanied by prayer and ongoing conversion.
Now we will connect each source of information with the inner circle (that is, the core of the person) with a line. This line represents the person’s efforts to discover the necessary information from these sources in order to make a decision.
Let us illustrate this search by means of an example. A first-year college student discovers that she is pregnant, and the university doctor who gave her this information recommends that she have an abortion. He suggests to her that there is nothing wrong with an abortion, since the fetus is not yet a human being. The woman and her boy friend go to the pastor for advice.
At this point the pastor’s task is to help them realize that the question is not whether to have an abortion or not, but rather, “What is the objective reality of an abortion?” That is, “What is the meaning of such an action?” In order to answer this question, one must then ask: “What is actually in her womb? Is there a human being there or not?”
(i) Knowledge of Human Nature: We begin to answer these questions by seeking information from the first source mentioned above: our knowledge of human nature. This includes all scientific information which is now available. A study of this material shows that a new human being exists from the time of conception. For example, the late Dr. Jerome Lejeune, who was the world’s leading geneticist, states very firmly that it is a biological fact that “human life begins at conception.” 6
(ii) The Wisdom of the Ages: The second source of information is the wisdom of the ages. In other words, what have we learned, from our years of history and observation, about this question of the child in the womb? In particular, what have we learned from our mistakes i.e. abortion? The abortions themselves continually reveal to us that it is a human being in the mother’s womb.
(iii) Our Reason: The third source of information comes from using our reason. Our reason was given to us by God and He wants us to use it to understand truth and to call it by name. This also means using our reason to better understand the content of (i) and (ii) and to try to gain new insights into the truth of the child in the womb. We cannot rely only on feelings for this understanding; we must use our intellect. And, as result of this effort at understanding, we may find that new insights develop.
(iv) Scripture: Scripture provides a fourth and very important source of information for informing our consciences, since it often shows us truths which we either are not able to see or do not see clearly on our own, for example the truth that it is good to “Love your enemy” (Mt. 5:44). With respect to the question of whether human life exists in the womb, scripture shows us the truth in St. Luke’s account of Mary’s visit to Elizabeth. Only a few days after Mary conceived, (by the power of the Holy Spirit) Elizabeth, inspired by that same Holy Spirit, recognized the presence of a new human being in Mary’s womb (Lk. 1:39-45). The scriptures are an important source of information for us, since original sin has affected our ability to see beyond appearances. And so, through scripture, God provides us with the assistance of what we might call divine clarity.
(v) The Teaching Authority of the Church: Christ himself speaks to us through the teaching authority of his Church; this gives us our fifth source of information, one which for Catholics is very important. It was entrusted to the Apostles and their successors to preserve and hand on what Christ had taught. They were also given the task of guiding the followers of Christ in applying these teachings to new situations as they arose. We also know that Christ gave us the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of Truth, to ensure that the truth is always available to us. Furthermore, the Spirit of Truth stands against the spirit of untruth, so that the gates of Hell cannot prevail against Christ’s Church (cf. Mt. 16:18 and Acts 2:lff). Christ has given us so much through the Church. Through her he gave us the Scriptures of the New Testament and a guarantee of the Old Testament and the one who interprets the Scriptures with authority. Consequently the Church has much to teach us about objective reality (truth) because Christ is truth.
If we take our example of the question of when human life begins, we can receive guidance from the Church’s teaching about the dogma of the Immaculate Conception. Essentially this dogma says that Mary was conceived by her parents, Anna and Joachim, free from original sin and full of grace. Faith and reason teach us that only a person can be free from sin and full of grace. Therefore, the dogma of the Immaculate Conception only makes sense if Mary was created a human person at the moment of conception. She confirmed this truth at Lourdes (1858) when she said to Bernadette, “I am the Immaculate Conception.” The Immaculate Conception thus confirms with divine clarity that a human person is created at the moment of conception.
The gift of faith enables us to benefit from this divine clarity. As a theological virtue faith elevates our intellect’s ability to know with God — i.e. God knows that He has created a new person at the moment of conception. Faith also strengthens our will in saying Yes - I believe, to what we have come to know with God. “By faith, man completely submits his intellect and his will to God” (cf. CCC #143).
In this and various other ways, the Catholic Church fulfills its role of service to the truth. Vatican II expressed it in the following way: “The Catholic Church is by the will of Christ the teacher of truth. It is Her duty to proclaim and teach with authority the truth which is Christ, and at the same time, to declare and confirm by Her authority the principles of the moral order which spring from ‘human nature’ itself.” “
b) Internal Source: After having gathered information from all these sources, we must take it into the core of our person, where we can put it together by means of our own reasoning. We also discuss it with God, which means we come to God in prayer. All of these efforts help to clarify the picture of the objective reality we are seeking. Once the picture is sufficiently clarified, we have informed our conscience.
1. Responding to Objective Reality: Let us now return to the pregnant college student and her friend. After having informed their conscience as described above, they know with certainty that a new human being exists within her womb. This is the objective reality; once it is accepted, it automatically raises another question: “How will we relate to this new person? Will we be generous and creative or selfish and destructive?” To have an abortion would be to act selfishly and destructively: it would be, in fact, to destroy another human being’s life. To respond positively means to ask, “What is the good which needs to be done for this new person we have discovered?” From the perspective of the gospel, a new neighbour has been discovered — a neighbour in need. For the present, that is, while in his mother’s womb, the needs of this new neighbour are simple: a bit of nourishment, some warmth and shelter, a space for exercise and a bit of time to grow. The only one able to respond to these basic needs is the young woman within whose womb the new neighbour is now living. One would hope that support and encouragement would also come from the biological father, the families and society.
Even if support does not come from these quarters, however, the objective reality of the good which needs to be done for this new neighbour remains the same. Such a situation serves to emphasize the fact that truly loving one’s neighbour often requires effort and sacrifice. Christ himself made great efforts and sacrifices to love us in our need of salvation.
At this point the two people have also informed their consciences as to the good which needs to be done for their new neighbour. With this solid knowledge, they each stand before God, in that inner circle, to decide whether to do the good or not. God also stands with them to encourage them to love their new neighbour, as he himself does.
a) Loving and Creative: If the decision is ‘yes’, then everyone benefits. Not only will the new neighbour benefit and grow from this decision, but so will all the others who know the couple. For that decision will help to make the couple more creative and loving. In saying ‘yes’ to this new life, they have chosen to follow Christ more closely — who gave his life that we might live.
b) Selfish and Destructive: On the other hand, the couple, after having informed their conscience, may choose not to love their new neighbour, but to have an abortion. If so, they will definitely know what they have done. Since they know, there is the possibility of repentance in the future and thus a turning back to God for forgiveness and inner healing. If instead they had followed the doctor’s initial advice and proceeded, thinking (subjectively) that no human being existed in the womb, the results would have been the same for the new neighbour — he would have been destroyed. And objectively this destruction of the child would have eaten away at their own truth, goodness and beauty, because what they did was contrary to their having been created in the image and likeness of God. Such an act leaves deep inner wounds; these can only be healed by acceptance of the objective reality, repentance and asking forgiveness from God. Without an informed conscience the couple is deprived of that opportunity, and may suffer for years before discovering the reality and the cure.
One is very much aware of this problem as a confessor. Sometimes it is only five, ten, or even twenty years later that the person’s conscience is finally properly informed on such a matter. When this happens and they seek the confessional, the results can be amazing. But sometimes that search for the truth is delayed by seeking help from the wrong sources. For example, there was a woman who, five years after her abortion, was beginning to suspect the source of her interior problems. She went to a psychiatrist who did not believe in God. This doctor later said to me (without revealing any names): “I don’t know why she has a problem. I told her she got rid of it five years ago.” Sad to say, five years before she had aborted her child, which did not get rid of her ‘problem’. Rather, the abortion was the cause of the enormous problem she now had.
I mention these examples to emphasize how terribly important it is for each of us to make the effort to discover objective reality, even to the point of making sacrifices to this end. For only by doing this can we understand the real meaning of what we intend to do or of what we have done. Once again we see that it is the truth which sets us free.
The whole process which we have described (searching out the objective reality and discovering the real meaning of our actions, either those we intend or those in the past) is what we call informing our conscience.
It is a rightly informed conscience which the Church teaches us to follow. This is because if a person informs his conscience properly, that is, in the way we have explained above, then he will have discovered the truth and will be following the truth. And the truth becomes the pathway to God.
I would emphasize that it is an informed conscience which we are to follow — not just our conscience. Conscience by itself does not create truth, nor is it an oracle which proclaims truth. Rather, it enables us to work in harmony with truth and in this way be true to our dignity as human beings made in the image and likeness of God.
There are many who claim to follow their conscience but who, at the same time, lack an understanding of what it means to have an informed conscience. As a result, they often end up following the guidance of subjective reality (for example, their feelings or what everybody is saying or doing). This eventually leads them down the path walked by Adam and Eve.
We are meant to be about something very important, when we make the effort to inform our conscience. We may emphasize this by reflecting on the two Latin works from which the word conscience is formed: con and scientia, meaning with and knowledge from the root, scire, i.e. to know. In this sense, our conscience is for knowing with someone, and the one we really want to know with is God. Thus, to make the effort to inform one’s conscience is to make the effort to come to know with God. And if I come to know with him, then I can walk with him as a friend and together we can walk into eternity. Let us look back at ‘the beginning’ from this perspective. In the beginning Adam and Eve knew with God and so walked with him in the cool of the evening; biblically speaking, this is the time shared with good friends. Later, they decided to know with someone else, namely, Satan. We know the results of this decision: you walk with the one with whom you know and make decisions with him. They no longer knew with God and so no longer walked with him. Again we see the true importance of informing our conscience: it is absolutely necessary if we are to walk with the right person, who is Truth, Life and Love, in all things.
Conscience formation is an ongoing process of searching for and discovering objective truth and meaning. God has provided and continues to provide what we need. But we must have an attitude of openness to the truth, which means certain humility; for we are discovering truth, not creating it. St. Augustine expresses it well in his Confessions when he says, “[God,] You answer clearly, yet not everyone hears clearly. All ask what they wish, but do not hear what they wish. He serves you best who aims not to hear from you what he wishes, but to will whatever he hears from you.” 8 An Indian proverb expresses this truth in another way: “To him who will not accept the truth as a friend, it comes as a conqueror.”
In many respects our conscience is a reminder of our dignity and freedom, and how very much God respects both We have the ability to know whomever we choose, and thus to walk with whomever we choose God respects our choice and the consequences, but he is not indifferent He has done and continues to do a great deal to help us to know him, who is love, so we can walk with him. There are countless examples of this throughout salvation history.
Cf. The Second Vatican Council Gaudium et Spes N. 24.
More often, though, advertising is used not simply to inform but to persuade and motivate - to convince people to act in certain ways: buy certain products or services (Ethics in Advertising, Pontifical Council for Social Communications Feb. 25, 1999).
Cf. St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologiae, I, 20, 2.
Cf. Catechism of the Catholic Church.
Second Vatican Council, Gaudium et Spes, n. 16.
As quoted in Andras Tehan, A Case of Life and Death: The Trial of the Century (Battleford, Sask.: Marian Press, 1983) p26.
Second Vatican Council Dignitatis Humanae, 14. In matters of faith and morals the Catholic knows that the sign of any teacher’s authenticity is this harmony which exists between his teaching and that of the Church, as expressed by the Pope. If that harmony is lacking, then the Catholic is wise to say to such a teacher, “Thanks, but no thanks.” This principle has been used to evaluate even some pastors and bishops over the centuries; for, unfortunately, some pastors and bishops have taught heresies, and had heresies named after them. But no Pope, as Pope, has ever taught a heresy or had one named after him.
As quoted in A Short Breviary (Collegeville, Minn.: St. John’s Abbey Press, 1975), p. 217.
Rev. Joseph Hattie, OMI
Today’s secular world of unproven philosophies, bad arguments, uninformed opinions and private agendas often attempts to create it’s own reality - a subjective reality This is especially true in the areas of morals: what is right and wrong, what is good and bad.
In his concise book “An Informed Conscience: Walking with God”, Father Hattie draws on his doctorate in Theology, the Holy Father and St. Thomas Aquinas and provides the reader with a clear guide to properly forming their conscience resulting in truthful living with yourself and those around you. Complemented with clear examples, he methodically covers the fundamentals: the truth about you and others, how you see things, how and why your decisions impact yourself and those around you, privileges and corresponding responsibilities and how to discover and discern the real truth in others and situations.
The result: living in the truth - the one true objective reality - sets us free, realizes our dignity as human beings and enables us to see the good that needs to be done. We can walk comfortably with God in truth, both now and in Heaven. [The only purpose of this instruction is that there should be love, coming out of a pure heart, a clear conscience and a sincere faith (Timothy 1:5].
At the writing of this book Rev. Joseph Hattie, an Oblate of Mary Immaculate (OMI) was the director of the Office of Marriage and Family Formation for the Archdiocese of Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, and has helped thousands of couples prepare for marriage and the blessing and responsibility of children. He has a doctorate in the Theo1o~ of Marriage and Family from Lateran University in Rome. He has written and published a marriage and family preparation course and Totally Yours, commentary and reflections on Humanae Vitae. Fr. Hattie is presently Consultant and Resource Person for marriage and family preparation development for the Archdiocese of Halifax, Antigonish and Yarmouth, Nova Scotia.
Published by
Priests for Life Canada
www.priestsforlifecanada.com
Revised 2001
First Printed in 1991
By the Office of Marriage and Family Formation Archdiocese of Vancouver
ISBN 0-9683191-0-6
Available in booklet format (40 pages, 5.5" x 8.5") for $3.00 per copy, plus $1.25 shipping, from:
Priests for Life Canada
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